Same job, different uniform.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Women sit or move to and from, some old, some young, the young are beautiful--but the old are more beautiful than the young.

I am anticipating a visit from my mother. It's been over three months since I've seen her and that's three months too long.

When she's here, we'll enjoy haunting Fritz's and Bourdon's, local rummage stores, long talks about light fixtures and paint colors, and the U.S. premier of Season Four of Doctor Who.

That's not what I'm pining over, though.

I felt oddly affectionate towards our friend's significant other tonight at dinner, when I considered the wrinkes around her neck. Missing mom, I mused.

Missing mom pulling her glasses up on her head so she can read the menu. Missing the smell of Pleasures when I hug her neck. Missing her kind, honest laugh when we tease her about age or housekeeping. Missing the chance to rub her feet while she reads a magazine. Missing snuggling up to her before I go to bed.

Wrinkles. Near-sightedness. Humility. Sore feet. Generosity of spirit.


I treasure the imperfections and improvements 55 years of living has produced in my mother. Remembering how she looked before she covered her grey is almost impossible. She must grieve this, but I don't. I think I just realized, it, too; looking at my new friend's neck!

Surely aging is something to be grasped, not merely endured! O that I and all the women of my generation would stop dreading what is simply beauty transformed; beauty realized.

O for jowels and wrinkles galore--if they mean wisdom and compassion and modesty.

I ask you: Who is more interesting? Kirsten Dunst or Dame Judi Dench? Olympia Dukakis or Natalie Portman? Maggie Thatcher or Kiera Knightly?

Whitman was right.
The old are more beautiful than the young.

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Blogger Unknown said...

You are so blessed. I did visit my mom this week. She is in a nursing home and very depressed. I'll have to post about the whole situation some time. She's in her early 70's, so that puts me in your older and wiser group! I recently stopped coloring my prematurely (at 20) gray hair and now look like a real grandma to my 2 (almost 3) grandbabies. They rock my world!

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Blogger Grande Dame said...

I am nearly 61 and feel greatly blessed for having Judi Dench so prominent in my "mature years". If I would have felt badly about wrinkles of age, graying/whitish hair etc. she has brought me much peace. I met her in person and was even more impressed. I agree that she is certainly more interesting than the younger more flashing actresses. Just watch "Last of The Blonde Bombshells to see some of the best. Enjoy your Mom. Mine is 84 and has alzheimers so is present but isn't if you know what I mean. Age can be brutal in that way so we must enjoy the transition while we can.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Blogger Lois E. Lane said...

Gulp. That is gorgeous, girlfriday -- a word aptly spoken.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Blogger girlfriday said...

Thanks sis.

Mocove and bbestnana, thanks both for your comments. My mom worries about Alzheimers (time to start drinking coffee, ma!), but she always graciously says that if it comes, she hopes she "goes to a happy place." So do I.

Thanks for the movie referral, bbestnana! Hadn't heard of that one, and I'm a big JD fan.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Blogger A. said...

Wow, powerful post, loved it. I agree wholeheartedly, and was thinking thoughts along this line all of last week due to an experience last weekend.

I attended a morning writer's school workshop with two other aspiring writers-- one was 87 the other 75. By the end of the day, it was clear that the beauty of a woman becomes more vibrant with age, and the attention they gave ME, wow, compassionate and wise and giving beyond compare, and yes, far more INTERESTING than most younger women.

To hear an 87 year old woman stand up and recite a personal essay she'd penned entitled, 'The Power of a Woman' where she chronicles the joys of painting her nails and dying her hair, and having her home be her 'castle'... it was awesome, mesmerizing, and inspiring, gives me goosebumps just to think about it.

This post reminds me of what I saw last weekend, and then some. These are the women who should be on billboards!

Monday, April 14, 2008

Blogger elphaba said...

I'm saying a prayer right now for help to invest my time and efforts more on developing my inner beauty and strength.
Age is a state of mind and we do have a lot more control over its development than that of, say, our jowels.
Thanks for the chance to think about it and to picture your sweet mama.

Monday, April 14, 2008


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