Same job, different uniform.

Thursday, July 03, 2008

Shocked in the Produce Section of Costco

Dear 70-ish Woman at Costco This Morning:

You look great! Clearly you work out. You were glistening with sweat and your hair looked damp beneath your visor this morning as you perused the produce at Costco. Perhaps you had just come from a tennis match? I'm guessing some sport with alot of arm action since your arms looked tanned and well toned.

Speaking of arms: cute little sleeveless top you had on. Very sporty! And it perfectly matched you skirt (or was it a skort?). They must have come as a set. And it showed your legs off nicely. I could tell that it was no illusion that you work hard at keeping fit, because I could see almost ALL of your legs. Yup! Nearly right on up to that mysterious part of womanhood that, well, some of us, like to be a little bit more mysterious about.

And since we are on the topic of the skirt, I might as well point out that it was a bit tight. Though I could tell you work out, and you WERE sweaty this morning, I confess that the more I think about it the more curious I am about what sport exactly you were playing this morning since I'm pretty sure you would not have been able to move quickly in that garment. Unless, of course, the length of it enabled you to accomplish movement since it was in fact cut almost above the thigh - you know, like a swimsuit . . . . or underwear.

Now, don't get me wrong. You look great. But still - you are about 70. And while there is nothing that says you shouldn't be sexy, sensual, attractive and fit at that age - some things, like breasts, bottoms and skin, still fall no matter what you do, short of surgery.

I applaud you for not having surgery. But, in the future, it might be helpful to keep in mind that less is not always more.

Somewhat astonished customer, also perusing produce at Costco this morning, but wearing age appropriate clothing that covered her twice c-sectioned belly and left a little the imagination.

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Blogger elphaba said...

Hill -air-e-us!!! Oh my gosh! That is so funny. Too bad you didn't secretly take a snap shot with your camera phone.
There was a woman at Starbucks one time who was wearing very high wasted and very cut off jean shorts. This woman did not work out and her butt cheeks reflected this very well. Ewwww! Everyone in the store except for her had a secret astonishment conversation going on without words. We all just kept staring at her and then each other. It was a life changing moment.
Maybe it was this woman's mother that you saw at CostCo??

Thursday, July 03, 2008

Blogger JEB said...

HA! I know I'm being such a you know what, but I was seriously caught off guard. :}

Friday, July 04, 2008


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